How did I decide to live a less cluttered life?
Between college, work, and fellowship, I moved 8 times in the last 9 years before I settled in a 950 square foot apartment in the Washington D.C. area with my new husband. Before this, we had two places totaling 2100 square feet and two apartments' worth of furniture. I collected stuff all through my travels and paid thousands to move it with me. Suddenly all 121 boxes of it was sitting in my living room!
A few weeks later I was watching a video by Dave Crenshaw about time management when I realized that I wasn't feeling stressed because I was managing my time badly. No, I was stressed out because I had too much in my life, in every way. I don't need 121 boxes of stuff.
How did my-parents-the-hoarders affect my decision to start decluttering?
Since college, every time I would go home I would find myself getting more frustrated with the offices that were filled to my shoulders with junk, the piles of boxes that didn't belong to me but kept ending up in my room, and the 1000-square foot basement that was filled with junk. I realized that this wasn't normal. No, my parents are hoarders. I was not going to turn into my parents.
Joanna
myparentsarehoarders@gmail.com
ps. Yes, the junk-filled room in the banner is my folks' basement. It's really that bad.
I am at the end of this challenge that I started last February. Taking time was so key for me. I got rid of things that never even hit my radar before and I didn't do any fed-up clean outs where I ditched stuff that I later had to replace again. I don't miss or regret any of it! I even decluttered a piano! LIfe is so much better now.
ReplyDeleteHi Megan! Fear of needing something again is an issue for me so I'm thrilled to hear that you accomplished a major decluttering project and don't regret it one bit. Thanks for the encouragement and thanks for reading!
ReplyDeleteOk, so this is where I should say Nice Blog! Well written, so appropos. More power to you on this journey/effort/lifestyle... You really are doing great, so congratulations. Keep up the good work and keep sharing. We can all use the stories, thoughts, and inspiration.
ReplyDeleteHi Jay! Thank you for stopping by. I truly appreciate your kind words and I'm thrilled that you're enjoying my blog. Please feel free to let me know if there are any topics you'd like me to post on. I'm also happy to have guest posts, in case you'd like to contribute anything!
DeleteI swear I could have written this word for word. I too live in DC, and I'm moving from a 2 bedroom mild hoarding situation.. into a 1 bedroom tomorrow. I am so overwhelmed by packing it all before the movers come, to the point where I'm having chest pains. I feel deeply embarrassed letting the movers in to see my hoarding. Thank you for this blog.. I was looking for support for hoarders who are moving and found you.
ReplyDeleteHey -- no worries. Movers get paid by the hour, so I bet they're thrilled to have more to move, they'll make more money! Tip them well and they won't care what or how much they have to move. We paid our movers to move 11 5-gallon paint buckets of water. Yes, water. (Okay, it was fishtank water, and aquarium fish die if they suddenly get all new water.) They were totally cool with it.
DeleteSecondly, my therapist says we need to stop being mind readers. We have absolutely no idea what the other person is thinking. We're harsher judges of ourselves than other people are of us. And if the guy is grimacing, maybe it's that he's thinking of his taxes, which are due in a couple weeks! He's also probably seen much, much, much worse than your two bedroom place. In DC people move 10-bedroom mansions and then don't tip. I bet they hate that a lot more than our piled up 2 bedroom places.
Take a breath. That you're reading this kind of thing means you're on the path to help. Congratulate yourself instead of beating yourself up!
Thank you for your kind reply! My movers didn't move most of my stuff.. there was so much, and they spent 8 hours moving my big furniture plus a few boxes. They left all of my extra things all over the place, and I have to be out by tomorrow. I had a breakdown in front of them and they said they would come back in the morning. I cannot move all of this stuff with no help. I am frantic. I am tossing most of the stuff and will work thru the night. I cannot believe I let my clutter get to this point :(
ReplyDeleteHey, it's okay! What's the worst that could happen -- a serious question. Well, probably the worst thing is that it would take you beyond tomorrow to move out. And then what? Well, maybe you'd get fined by your apartment complex. But you won't be thrown in jail, fired from your job, and your friends and family will all still be alive and some may even be around to support you.
DeleteIn the end, the worst that can happen is you will lose some money. I can't say that's horrible because I've lived at the poverty line before and I know that a fine can be terrifying. But it could be so much worse, and you'll have your experience to motivate you from now on. One thing at a time, you can do it!
Hello AH.. well I got an extension on moving stuff out! I have until 1pm sunday, and I had some friends come and help me.. they didn't know what I've been living in so they were shocked.. but boy did they pitch in and help! It was painful letting them in on this hoarding.. but it has been therapeutic. I will NOT do this in my new place. I have tossed so much stuff out that I was clinging too. I'm really out of my comfort zone letting these things go that I love.. but I do not want to live like this anymore. I will be downsizing like a mutha and it feels good! I thank you so very much!
ReplyDeleteI can imagine how hard it was to tell your friends. It was so hard for me to come out and say that I had an eating disorder, but afterwards it feels like a huge weight off the shoulders and totally will help you move forward. Great job!
DeleteI never thought about getting rid of just one item each day. I get overwhelmed at JUST HOW MUCH CRAP I need to sort through. But who said I have to do it all at once? I can't manage an entire room, because the idea staggers me & I head for the couch to hide under an afghan as I snooze away into escapism... but throw away one object every day? Hey, I can do that! Thank you so much for the idea! I'm totally in this challenge now. I'm going to add it to my blog, & track my progress, & report back here to let you know how much you've inspired me to DIG MY WAY OUT! Let the challenge begin! :)
ReplyDeleteAndi-Roo /// @theworld4realz
http://www.theworld4realz.com/
theworldforrealz@gmail.com
You can absolutely do it! Just one thing each day, no matter how small. Keep a list in a little notebook. It'll add up faster than you think! Please do stop in and let everyone know how you're doing. If you'd like to do a guest post please let me know!
DeleteYou can do it! My dad's a saver and my mom is a compulsive shopper/organized hoarder. Being forced to dust over 100 porcelain dogs twice a week as a household chore taught me to love clean surfaces. A million frames to glass wax told me my walls look just fine bare. I've been a minimalist for life and you can totally pare down too.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the encouragement! I had the same reaction too. We got rid of all of the tables in our living room because I didn't want there to ever be the temptation to dump stuff on a flat surface. 100 porcelain dogs? Wow.
DeleteIt sounds like you've learned a lot. Please feel free to share more of your wisdom, I'm sure a lot of us here can use it!
Wow, Joanna, we seem to have a lot in common! I am also the child of a hoarder and a medical librarian. I've been decluttering my life since I moved out of my mother's hoard to go to college. I'm looking forward to following your journey and being inspired to continue to question why I hold on to things.
ReplyDeleteThanks for following my blog. Good for you, you can do this!
ReplyDeleteFor years, my mother has been a hoarder. Not the really messy kind, but she was very emotional about getting rid of items, even if she was not using them. She always had to hold on to something in case she needed it one day. Amazingly, she is now 78 and is finally starting to purge a bunch of stuff. She puts a big plastic bag out for the Salvation Army every month. I think some of the hoarder/clutter shows has scared her into action. People can change.
I've just found your blog and already read a few good posts about clutter and all that. I'm not a hoarder by any means, but I could use help decluttering and organizing for sure.
ReplyDeleteWelcome Oscar! I'm sure you'll find a number of us here who have struggled with clutter, big and small. Thanks for reading and I hope to see you again!
DeleteI just found your blog and I have to say what you have gone through hurts my heart and I'm sorry you had to deal with all of it. From what I can tell you are a strong, smart beautiful woman and don't ever let anyone tell you differently!
ReplyDeleteJanine, thank you so much for your kind words. They're so important and what you've said means the world to me. All the best to you. Thank you for reading my blog!
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